In Memoriam

To complete his family, Bob wanted to adopt Peter as quickly as possible. Peter was about the same age that Bob was when he arrived in the U.S., and Bob looked forward to guiding his new son through learning about life here just as Bob had. During the adoption process, it was necessary to get the approval of Peter's birth father, but this was difficult because the father was a merchant seaman who spent most of his time at sea. When Bob did finally make contact with him, the father immediately approved of the adoption of his child without protest.

Bob was looking forward to enjoying life with his newly formed family, but Joanna had different ideas. She had done some research and found that marrying Bob would put her on the fast track to U.S. citizenship. She also found that, if she was a domestic violence victim and had a restraining order against Bob, she would be moved to the front of the line on that fast track, be eligible for free or subsidized housing, be awarded child support from Bob far more generous than the paltry stipend she received in Poland for Peter, and have her and the children's other needs provided by the government.

Joanna concocted a story about domestic violence and moved with the children to the local women's shelter. With the help of the shelter workers she was able to get a temporary restraining order, but apparently her story was not credible enough to get a final restraining order without the help of a free lawyer from Legal Services of New Jersey. The free lawyer also filed for divorce for Joanna, and then the really sneaky lawyer-instigated or initiated tricks began.

From the beginning, Bob tells us, because of the domestic violence allegation, Bob was permitted to only see Magan in supervised parenting time. Peter, under the influence of his mother, said he didn't want to see his father at all. Then Joanna told Bob that, if he ever got unsupervised parenting time, she would penetrate Magan and say that Bob had sexually abused her. One day when he was in court Bob noticed that Joanna had brought Magan who was toddling on the other side of the room. He went over to say hello to Magan, but Joanna covered her face with a blanket so she couldn't see her father. Then Joanna went to a sheriff’s officer, told him Bob had made a terroristic threat to her, and Bob was arrested for violating the restraining order. Bob was found not guilty, as he also was for three other allegations of restraining order violations.

FACE has heard all of those things before in other cases, but that wasn't the end of the dirty tricks in this case. Bob tells us that Joanna filed a complaint with the police that Bob had stolen a truck from her. In truth, the allegedly stolen truck was one of Bob's work trucks. When Joanna had gone to the DMV with the title to register the truck, she registered it in her own name. Next, Joanna complained to the EPA that Bob was burying 55 gallon drums of toxic waste in his backyard. The EPA came in with backhoes and dug up the backyard, but found nothing. (As they often do, sheriff's officers had already torn Bob's house apart looking for weapons.)

Due to the stress of continually having to look over his shoulder and wondering what new false allegations his ex-wife was going to bring against him next, Bob lost his businesses and took a job as a tractor-trailer driver. Wednesday was always his day off, because that was his supervised parenting time day with Magan. He would spend the whole day getting ready and buying small gifts for Magan.

Parenting time was supervised first by Catholic Charities, then later moved to the courthouse. At least half the time Joanna would cancel, often at the last minute, for some lame excuse, or just not show up.

In February 2010 Bob hired one of the top lawyers from one of the most prominent law firms in New Jersey (names will be provided upon request) to get him out of supervised parenting time. Over the next six months, they took $4,235 of Bob's money, but never filed a single document with the court. Bob fired them and filed a complaint with the Better Business Bureau. The lawyer told the Better Business Bureau he would give Bob a partial refund, but Bob never received it.

Then Bob came to FACE. At this time Magan was 5 1/2 years old and had seen her father only in supervised parenting time for five years. With FACE assistance, in April 2011 Bob filed a pro se motion for UN-supervised parenting time with Magan, and to re-establish a parent-child relationship with Peter.

Shortly after filing, a brick was mysteriously thrown through the windshield of Bob's truck. Bob didn't think Joanna had the strength to throw a brick through a windshield. He suspected that it was thrown by Peter (who, coincidentally, is the valedictorian of Burlington County Technical Institute's graduating class of 2011 http://www.phillyburbs.com/news/local/burlington_county_times_news/teen-excellence-peter-blicharz/article_be2f57dd-9844-5a78-99e9-ff94c6cddc17.html ). Bob withdrew his request for parenting time with Peter.

Burlington County family court judge Kenneth Domzalski (who many lawyers complain has great difficulty ever making a decision about anything) heard the case. Despite glowing recommendation letters from both Catholic Charities and the courthouse supervisors, instead of just ending the supervision, Domzalski ordered that Bob must first get an updated risk assessment (cost $1,000), pay off $5,000 in child support arrears and, because of the arrears, pay $800 of his ex-wife's counsel fees (even though she gets free lawyers). Interestingly, when asked why the risk assessment was necessary when the supervisors wrote in their letters of Bob's loving relationship with Magan and the strength of the parent-child bond, Domzalski said “I've never seen an unfavorable report from a supervisor.” If that is true and supervisors' opinions cannot be trusted, why ever waste anyone's time using supervisors at all?

So, once again, as too often happens, a family court judge treated a father as nothing more than a wallet and a sperm-donor. Bob gave first priority to the risk assessment. The report was very positive, but it was delayed over a month because the psychologist (name available on request) went on vacation. Bob filed another motion for unsupervised parenting time. It was to be heard on October 7, 2011.

In his frustration while waiting, Bob took FACE's advice to “Never Do Nothing.” He went to the Burlington County Prosecutor's office to file a criminal complaint against Joanna for Interference with Custody (New Jersey statute 2C:13-4 – an indictable offense). The supporting evidence was the letters from the supervisors documenting canceled and missed parenting times, and Bob's log of the missed days – a total of 20 missed times out of 36 weeks since parenting time was moved to the courthouse! The detective Bob spoke with (himself a divorced father) was told by his supervisor not to take Bob's complaint, but he did refer Bob to the detective who handles family matters for the Mount Holly police department, and charges were filed in municipal court.

Bob also re-opened his Better Business Bureau case against the lawyer who took his money and did nothing for him, and then didn't honor his commitment to the BBB to refund Bob's money.

Bob's workday started at about 5:00 AM. On Thursday morning, September 29, 2011, Bob didn't show up for work. This was very unusual for Bob, and his employer phoned a mutual friend and asked him to go and check whether Bob was OK. The friend went to Bob's house and found him in bed, but couldn't wake him. He called 9-1-1.

So, that is the end of the story for Bob Blicharz. What will the results be? The hundreds of people who attended his viewing have lost their son, brother, friend, neighbor, co-worker, or fellow FACE member. Joanna loses her big American child support check, and will have to find somewhere else to spew her hatred. We now see why her first husband didn't object to Bob adopting Peter. He would finally be rid of Joanna forever and would be able to come back home to Poland and resume a normal life. Maybe anyone new Joanna tries to get involved with will find this web page and have second thoughts about having anything to do with her. Peter, although he is still immature and under his mother's thumb, might some day wake up and realize he missed his last opportunity to have a father. And Magan, only 5 1/2 years old, who developed a strong father-child relationship with Bob even though for five of those years she only saw him in supervised parenting rooms, will never again have a hope of a normal relationship with her father. Maybe if the big shot lawyer from the big firm had done his job, or if judge Domzalski had done the right thing the first time, or if the psychologist put higher priority on Bob's risk assessment report than on his vacation, Bob would be alive today.

There was one more thing that Bob didn't get the chance to do. Legal Services of New Jersey has a web page that features the case they handled for Joanna – www.probononj.org/safesecure.aspx . It even includes photos of Joanna, Peter and Magan. Since Bob's last name, Blicharz, is unusual, anyone checking Bob out on the internet finds that web page. This has negatively effected Bob's reputation, his efforts to find better employment, and even his social and romance relationships. Bob's next move was to demand that Legal Services take down that web page. He never got a chance to do that. Maybe, now that Bob is gone, Legal Services will find this web page and just take down their web page on their own initiative.